Sun 30 Oct 2011

Turn that conference into a networking opportunity

Posted by Bev under networking, professional growth
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A young friend I’ll call Tracy has asked me to elaborate on my September 6 ezine on the topic of networking.  http://www.clearwaysconsulting.com/ezine-archive/2011/ezine_9_6_11.htm

Apparently Tracy is about to head off to a national conference. While there, she hopes to build her own professional network, and at the same time find ways to create value for the university where she works.

To begin with, Tracy started “a ‘goal list’ of people to meet and ideas to bring back.” She has asked for other suggestions for making the best of her time at the conference.

So here a few thoughts on networking at conferences:

o Don’t expect too much from a single opportunity. I like the idea of Tracy’s “goal list,” but at the same time I urge her not to put too much pressure on herself. Networking can be a long-term journey requiring flexibility, patience and many steps along the way. I hope that Tracy isn’t disappointed if she’s unable to check off all the items on her list. I urge her to be open to unexpected possibilities. And I remind her that there will be many networking opportunities after this one.

o Plan before you go. When you meet somebody at a professional event, they are likely to ask, “what do you do?” Before you take off to that conference, practice your “elevator speech,” so that you can quickly present the best version of your story. And while you are packing, pick clothing that will make you look like the successful professional that you want to become.

o Take a few risks. Know that most people feel shy at least some of the time. If nobody is speaking to you at an event, it might be because they don’t know what to say. Even if it makes you nervous, look for people who are standing or sitting alone, and go introduce yourself. Have a list of questions in mind, and give yourself the challenge of finding out about them. And if some stranger rejects you, let it go – they don’t know you, and it is probably their problem, not yours.

o Look for ways to serve. People who work on projects together are more likely to get to know each other than those who simply attend the same meetings. If you want to build relationships and create a higher profile, look for opportunities to do some of the work. Conferences often give rise to follow-up tasks and membership options. So join committees, sign up for mailing lists and volunteer for tasks.

o Follow up. When you do meet somebody interesting, find a way to stay in touch. Let them know you enjoyed speaking with them, send along information they might use and sign up for their mailing lists. And whenever it might be appropriate, send along timely “thank you” and congratulation notes.

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Sun 2 Oct 2011

Women leaders share tips

Posted by Bev under leadership, mentoring, women leaders
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On Friday at Ohio University I had the pleasure of moderating a wonderful panel on Women in Leadership. The three panelists, all extraordinary women, were former Ohio House Speaker Jo Ann Davidson, Ohio Supreme Court Justice Yvette McGee Brown and OU Executive Vice President and Provost Dr. Pam Benoit.

The event was sponsored by the OU’s Voinovich School of Leadership and Public Affairs, where for some years I have visited the Athens, Ohio campus as a senior fellow.

The discussion turned out to be a delight. These women were honest, fun and totally committed to helping the students and others in the audience. Instead of being a stuffy academic occasion, the program generated the special warmth that emerges where great women come together to let their hair down and support each other.

Collectively the panelists offered these words of advice to those who want to grow as leaders:

• Be yourself. The most effective leadership style is one rooted in self knowledge.

• Follow your moral compass. Develop and maintain a strong sense of your value system

• Do the jobs. Look around, see what needs to be done, and do it, even if it means taking up tasks that others don’t want.

• Manage your energy. Do what it takes to keep up your health and energy, and know that looking energetic and put together is important.

• Know the culture. Understand and address the organizational culture in which you are operating.

• Be a role model. Conduct yourself like the leader you hope to be, and carry yourself in a way that will set an example.

• Be a mentor. Build your network, look for opportunities to support others and don’t be afraid to ask for help.

• Have a plan or vision. Know what you want to accomplish, and start taking steps to get there.

• Take risks and accept challenges. Look for opportunities and take them, even if it makes you nervous.

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Wed 7 Sep 2011

Tips from successful networkers

Posted by Bev under career transitions, encore careers, job search, personal growth
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A client I greatly respect wasn’t impressed by the ezine I sent out yesterday.  My topic was networking, and her reaction was “well, duh!”   She said that everybody knows about the importance of networking, and she objected to the term “networking” because the concept should really be about relationships.

Here’s the link to my ezine: http://www.clearwaysconsulting.com/ezine-archive/2011/ezine_9_6_11.htm

I agree with my client’s discomfort with the term “networking” and think we may  need more than one word to describe different types of activity.  Social scientists have long used the term “social network” to describe a complex pattern of relationships that tie people together.   But recently “networking” has been used more broadly, to include marketing activities like passing out your business card to strangers, or using Twitter to build your business brand.

The point my ezine apparently didn’t drive home is that the foundation of your network should be a collection of real, authentic relationships with other people.  And networks cannot be created overnight.   Successful, happy people tend to place a high priority on staying in touch with the folks they know, and they consciously build and care for many types of relationships.

But I think that my client – a highly successful attorney – is incorrect in her view that everybody recognizes the great importance of networks.  I speak with many professionals who feel too busy to focus on their relationships.  And then they want to quickly make up for lost time when seeking new jobs or other kinds of change.

Forgetting about your network of relationships is an easy mistake to make.  Early in my career I felt guilty about chatting on the phone or otherwise spending much weekday time with friends who were not linked to my job responsibilities.  I restrained my natural tendencies as an extrovert, and worked hard to stay focused on the requirements of my position.

And yet when I look at the full scope of my career. there is no doubt that the best opportunities have come through my personal relationships.  There may have been short term results when I forced myself to stay on task, but much of the really good stuff has come through my friends, and their friends.

And I think that we can always learn new ways to do important things, like networking.  Now that I am trying to be even more conscious about building relationships, simply for the joy having a rich circle, I am open to new ideas about how to go about it.  In my ezine I shared tips from three accomplished networkers.  And if you have favorite practices and techniques I’d love to hear from you as well.

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Thu 4 Aug 2011

How’s your calendar? Is it on paper or electronic?

Posted by Bev under organizational techniques, productivity, workplace issues
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A nice long piece in the recent New York Times Sunday Style section looked at paper versus electronic calendars.  Writer Pamela Paul said “it would take cold hard cash” for her cross over from her paper-based personal organizer to a high tech version.

Paul described the growing shift toward electronic organizers, but said that, for herself, “I would rather live a life of 1,000 missed appointments.”

I loved the article partly because I have spent way too much energy on the issue.

Long before I became a coach, in my days as an attorney and executive, I understood that a meticulously maintained calendar is a key to getting things done.  And I don’t recall that it was much of an issue, back in the day when I kept a leather-bound organizer.

I moved to an electronic calendar ages ago so as to be available for people who prefer to schedule meetings that way.   But after more than a decade, I still don’t feel like I’ve got it right.

After several approaches, I went all Mac and now am using iCal.  I love the idea that once I add an appointment to a desktop the data will immediately appear on my iPhone and my iPad.  And because I go back and forth between a city house and a country house, coordinating between two Macs is a high priority.

But the reality isn’t a smooth as the concept.  My worst experience was when some of my data disappeared into a black hole in the Cloud.  It doesn’t happen often, the Apple tech people said, but occasionally data becomes corrupted and cannot be reconstructed.

Then there is handler error.  I suppose when I wrote appointments on paper I occasionally made a mistake.  But it didn’t happen often and it’s unlikely that more than one date was confused by any single error.  Now I screw up more often, and the impact can be bigger.

For example, with iCal I sometimes inadvertently add a date so that it is saved on the device I’m using, but not in the Cloud.  I thought I was past that, but it happened just last week.  I could recall sitting at the desk in the other house, inputting an appointment, but I couldn’t find it via the Cloud. It was particularly embarrassing to  ask the client about our next date together because the efficient use of her calendar was an item on our agenda.

But even when everything works fine, it’s just not the same.  My old leather binder was my friend, its presence was reassuring, and I trusted it absolutely.  And somehow the act of writing a date on the calendar engraved the information in my brain.  Once I wrote it down I’d look at the calendar more for confirmation than information.

So now, even as I bring my e-calendar under control, I’m looking at supplemental ways to master important information.  For client dates I’m playing with a new log book, where each client has a page with space to note their upcoming appointments.  It’s retro, and maybe a waste of time, but I’m enjoying the effort.

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Thu 28 Jul 2011

To get along better with a colleague, adjust your own attitude

Posted by Bev under difficult people, leadership, managing emotions, motivation, personal growth, Uncategorized, working with colleagues, workplace issues
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Have you been in a situation where your work life would be pretty good if it weren’t for your colleagues?

Last month I wrote an ezine article with tips for getting along with difficult people. http://www.clearwaysconsulting.com/ezine-archive/2011/ezine_6_21_11.htmand I

I heard back from a number of folks, many of whom described the problem of annoying co-workers as a big energy drain. In the ezine I mentioned a few tools for getting along better with people who drive you crazy. Among them is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, which can help you develop an understanding of people whose personality is very different from yours.

And I mentioned that Dr. Rick Brinkman and Dr. Rick Kirschner provide some useful tips for dealing with frequently encountered types of difficult personalities.

But what if you don’t have the time or interest to study up on personality types? A simple approach that works in a number of conflict situations is to start managing your own attitude.

Mindfulness studies and other research demonstrate that it is difficult to mask what we are feeling. So if we approach other people in a mood of anger, annoyance or contempt, they, at some level, have a pretty good idea of our emotional state. And they might respond to our bad attitude with an even stronger wave of anger or rudeness.

We can break the cycle, however, by choosing to change our own emotional state to one that includes compassion. And if we can achieve a state of calmness and empathy, we can dramatically change relationships that traditionally have been rocky.

This approach to attitude adjustment is easy to try:

(1) Start by noticing the emotions you experience when you interact with your difficult colleagues. Do you typically feel angry, tense or frustrated? Do you experience tension in certain parts of your body?
(2) Consider an alternative emotional state that might feel less stressful and also could generate a more positive response from your colleagues.
(3) Craft a simple phrase, like “I am calm and I feel compassion in my heart,” to help you achieve the emotional state that you believe will be positive and helpful.
(4) Practice summoning up the state you want when you are in non-threatening situations, like preparing to talk with servers in a restaurant. To do so, repeat your affirming phrase inside your own head. And visualize your breath as a calming stream flowing to the parts of your body where you are most likely to experience tension.
(5) Once you have practiced summoning up the more positive emotional state, try it out with your difficult colleagues. If you consistently choose a positive attitude when you approach them, you may find your relationships becoming less stressful and more productive.

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Tue 30 Nov 2010

You encore career can be the best one yet!

Posted by Bev under career transitions, encore careers
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Recently, I’ve been hearing frequently from two kinds of people. On the one hand are Boomers who are worrying about, or now coping with, forced retirements; and, on the other, are folks who have already launched their post-retirement careers.

If you’re one of those worrying about the job that follows your big job, let me share the good news: Many encore careerists are having the time of their lives. There are a lot of us out here engaged in fulfilling work, often earning decent money, and at the same time enjoying more balance in our lives.

A number of factors suggest that the phase that follows your career peak may be your best time of all. Consider these points:

• After mid-life, it gets better. Many studies suggest that middle age, for both men and women, is the least happy time. One of toughest periods in your life may be during your 40s, even though your career is thriving and you have much of what you thought you wanted. One big study suggests that our happiness level tends to follow a U-shaped curved, dipping after age 40 but then rising again later in life.

• You become your real self. Carl Jung coined the term “individuation” to describe the process by which you integrate all the aspects of your personality to become a fuller, richer person in the later years of life. He said that in youth we develop a social façade that helps us to get along well at school and work, but it can limit us as we continue to develop. In mid-life we may abandon some of the restrictions of our socialized persona, and find ways to pursue the things that really matter. Our new sense of self can help us see an entirely different set of career options.

• Lifelong learning can open new doors. Around the world, universities are recruiting older students, and in the U.S. adults over 55 are going back to school in growing numbers. A study on lifelong learning by the American Council on Education says that adults aged 50 and older represents 3.8% of students enrolled in for-credit courses at colleges and universities. http://www.acenet.edu/Content/NavigationMenu/ProgramsServices/CLLL/Reinvesting/MapDirections.pdf

• Many second actors are enjoying great careers. Financial journalist Kerry Hannon writes about Americans between the ages of 44 and 70 who have launched encore careers. For more than three years, she has been interviewing some of the estimated 8.4 million Americans who have moved from a corporate or other traditional job track to an entirely new career that combines income with personal meaning and social impact. In her book “What Next?” Hannon offers fascinating portraits of 16 people who have changed career paths. http://www.amazon.com/Whats-Next-Follow-Passion-Dream/dp/0811871150/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1291154597&sr=1-1

• Good health makes it possible. Obviously a key reason that Boomers can look forward to a very long career is that we enjoy the prospect of extraordinary longevity. If we’re already 50 we can expect to live to the mid-80s or longer. Studies suggest, however, that the lifestyle choices we make in mid-life may determine whether we have the health and vitality to enjoy a rewarding career later on. We can shape our lifestyle to delay or prevent many of the diseases and disabilities that could prevent us from engaging in meaningful work well into old age.

• We’ll make new friends. Having a network of supportive relationships can be a critical factor in successful aging. And having a broad network of connections can help us to spot opportunities as we restructure our careers again and again. The great news is that we won’t be alone as we look to forge new friendships. Middle-aged professionals may feel too busy to care for even their most treasured friendships, but priorities shift as people get older. After age 50, empty nesters and early retirees may refocus on their social lives, and we all may develop a new wave of nurturing relationships.

• Jobs will be there. With the U.S. unemployment still close to 10%, it may be hard to believe, but we’re heading toward another labor shortage. At Encore.org you can read an excellent study predicting that by 2018 there will be more jobs than people to fill them: http://www.encore.org/files/research/JobsBluestonePaper3-5-10.pdf For many sectors, the next generation of workers just won’t be able to fill the holes in the labor force. Employers will have an incentive to recruit retirees and to attract older workers by offering new kinds of training and schedule flexibility. Flextime and part-time schedules, job-sharing, and continued expansion of outsourcing will translate into new job opportunities for seniors.

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Tue 16 Nov 2010

Your manners when you dine can say a lot about you

Posted by Bev under business etiquette, personal growth, workplace issues
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Table manners can be a factor when you or your colleagues are trying to make a positive impression. More than that, dining out, whether as a host or a guest, is a social art form, and one that can support or undercut your path to professional success.

If you work in an environment where occasional meals are part of the culture, you might want to consider the roles of guests and hosts. Business may flow more smoothly if everybody on the team has an idea of the behavior expected.

I was recently at a dinner party where the hostess had gone to a lot of extra trouble to assure plenty of food for her houseguest, a vegetarian who had spent the day hiking. The guest — an educated, woman in her 40s and a colleague of the hostess — put her phone on the dinner table and throughout the meal eagerly exchanged adolescent text messages with her new boyfriend. She repeatedly interrupted the otherwise interesting conversation to share his most recent comments.

The hostess called the next day to say that she was mortified. The houseguest has an excellent job that requires a lot of social interaction, so it seemed unlikely that her rudeness was the result of ignorance. The message she telegraphed was that none of us at the table were worth the effort of good manners, because clearly she wouldn’t have been doing this with people she regarded as important.

And, the hostess said, the guest did not lift a finger all weekend, nor thank her for all the extra trouble to produce extra, vegetarian dishes!

As I wrote in this week’s ezine, most people know that the job of a dinner host includes providing the food and beverages, and taking steps to ensure that every guest is comfortable and has a good time. Even when there is a business component to the meal, the host is expected to maximize the guests’ enjoyment.

But not everyone realizes that dinner guests share in the responsibility of creating a successful evening. As a guest, one of your primary tasks is to assist in fostering discussion that everybody can enjoy. But don’t talk too much. Even if you’re the wittiest, highest ranking or most interesting person at the table, it’s boorish to hog the conversation. Use your talents to draw other people into the discussion.

For more pointers on dining out see:http://www.clearwaysconsulting.com/ezine-archive/2010/ezine_11_16_10.htm

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Thu 4 Nov 2010

10 Tips for Being Energetic & Innovative Even When Times are Stressful

Posted by Bev under change management, finding new energy, motivation, personal growth, workplace issues
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Like a lot of folks, the members of a team at an important organization are challenged to do more with less, in the midst of stressful times. They asked me to speak about ways they can keep up their energy and become even more innovative. And here are my 10 tips:

1. Think positive. When you are in a negative state, the voice inside your head may say “no” to every new idea, even the good ones. Notice your own reactions, and watch for knee-jerk thoughts like, “this won’t work” or “it’s hopeless.” Choose to re-program your defeatist self-talk with phrases like, “I’m open and willing to try!”

2. Challenge processes. “Continuous improvement” is one term to describe an environment where everyone is encouraged to simplify and clarify the ways that things get done in an organization. You can foster improvement by looking at and questioning every step in the way you gather data, manage projects and report on what you do. Be open to any suggestion or technology that might mean a tiny bit of work reduction or product improvement.

3. Draw a picture and look at pictures. If you organize your plans with a linear outline, you’ll be using the more analytical, left side of your brain. You will more fully engage the creative right side of your brain, as well, if you try something more graphic. Illustrate your challenges or projects with diagrams, using color and icons. Explore free “mind-mapping” software from sources like Wikipedia. And note that some experts say that increasing the visual stimulation in your office’s physical space can inspire people to think more innovatively.

4. Learn something new. If you’re in a slump or feeling bogged down, seek opportunities to study a new field or develop fresh expertise. The topics need not even be related to your job. When you are in learning state, you’ll bring new thinking and different approaches to your work. And when you know more, about a greater range of topics, you will be able to make associations that can turn into innovation.

5. Vary your routines. When you follow the same patterns every day, you may grow less aware of what is happening around you. Something as simple as a new route to work can make you more alert, and open to different ways of thinking. Find ways to change the way you do things. And if your work doesn’t vary much, look seek opportunities to rotate to new projects.

6. Seek collaborators. Research suggests that innovation tends to emerge in environments that encourage collaboration. One reason for this is that innovation emerges from a series of sparks – like from one person to another – and not in a single flash of insight. It can be particularly useful to brainstorm with people from different backgrounds or disciplines. A key, however, is to keep an open mind and actually listen to what the have to say.

7. Focus on your strengths. Identify the skills and approaches that work best for you, and look for additional ways that you might put them to work.

8. Focus on your stakeholders. Remind yourself about your mission and the people who have a stake in the success of your work. Focus on their needs and interests, and ask whether you might serve them in new ways.

9. Be real about deadlines. Avoid unnecessary time pressure by negotiating realistic due dates and staying focused on your top priorities. Schedule blocks of time for your most important work, and stick to your schedule. Don’t be sidetracked by emails and items on your “to-do” list that aren’t really that important.

10. Take breaks. When you work at the same tasks hour after hour, day after day, the creative parts of your brain may start to shut down. To be at your creative best, leave your desk every 90 minutes or so, take lunch breaks, and schedule regular vacations. Research show that you’ll be more productive – not less – if you allow time for renewal.

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Thu 2 Sep 2010

Does your nagging self talk still work for you?

Posted by Bev under motivation, personal growth, self talk
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When I was a kid, my parents never really made a big deal about grades. In fact, I can’t recall a single time when they complained, threatened or said anything negative about my performance at school.

I did get good grades, but when I came home with A’s their response was pretty low key. My Mother’s comment was typically something like, “that’s nice, but don’t show the other children because they might feel bad.” And I can still hear my Dad’s voice saying, “I’m very proud of you, but all we ever want is that you do your best.”

But despite my parents encouraging, tolerant attitude, the Voice inside my own head was often harsh. I remember tossing in bed when I was quite small, telling myself that if I didn’t work harder I would fail my math tests.

When I was a teenager, that internal Voice regularly prompted me to keep studying (and moderate my social life). “You’ll flunk!” was a frequent refrain. And that same message echoed in my head through college, grad school and law school. The truth was that if my Voice grew quiet I would find a way to hype it up – I had become dependent on motivating myself with a threatening commentary.

In the working world, for a long time, the messages in my head didn’t change much. Then came a time when I just couldn’t work much harder. I was engaged in a big project, and was traveling from state to state, testifying before commissions and legislatures about the value of small-scale power generation.

Things were moving so quickly that I was never well prepared, and I couldn’t do much about it. In order to offer effective testimony, I needed to sleep well and manage the stress, but my Voice was unrelenting, often keeping me awake.

I finally I realized that I had helped to program the Voice, and it had often been useful, helping me stay at my desk when I’d rather be partying. But while they once had utility, the endless negative messages were undercutting my ability to perform.

So I decided to re-program my internal dialogue. I learned to be alert to the start of the nagging Voice, and to silence the negative messages by repeating mantras along the lines of: “I’m strong, confident and relaxed.”

Now, as a coach, I often notice that clients seem to be tormented by nagging internal messages that once were useful, but now are counter-productive. Are the threats that kept your nose to the grindstone in college still be echoing in your head, even though those negative messages are no longer useful? Once you start to notice your own nagging self-talk, it can be surprisingly easy to change it.

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Thu 26 Aug 2010

What’s with Mean Girls at the office?

Posted by Bev under workplace issues
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Earlier this month in my ezine, I wrote about a recent conversation with 4 young women worried about the way they are treated by the more senior women in their various offices.

Although it appears that each of the four knows how to sustain strong friendships with other women, each believes that she is treated badly, or at least not supported, by older female colleagues. In other words, the women not only say that are they not being mentored, but they believe that their careers may be blocked by other women.

This ezine has sparked a lot of conversation. My younger friends seem to be not surprised by this phenomenon. But women closer to my age are more likely to be saddened and shocked – we have come a long way by supporting each other in the workplace.

I’d be interested to hear your thoughts.

Here’s the ezine link: http://www.clearwaysconsulting.com/ezine-archive/2010/ezine_8_3_10.htm

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